So after waiting over two years, I arrived in Seoul with Typhoon Hinnamnor. I was anxious about it. How anxious?
When I noticed the flight crew wearing those yellow hospital smocks, I thought it was because we were gonna have the kind of extreme turbulence that turns trays upside down and flying and they were worried about getting food on their clothes.
That’s where my brain was. The turbulence. The projectile gravy. The emergency landing. Not in causal order, probably.
And indeed quite a bit of turbulence brewed near the end of our flight, which, combined with a terrifyingly dense tuna wrap, made me sick to my stomach.
I’d never considered the existence of a barf bag on a flight before, but I started to wonder if it was big enough for the half to fully digested contents of my 15-hour flight.
I started taking inventory.
How much chapchae had I eaten? Not very much, it was terrible.
Fruit salad that was frozen from neglect. How little they cared about food quality! But then maybe they cared a lot, because if it’s frozen, I don’t have to worry about mold. Which can kill. Therefore, frozen fruit salad: life saving.
The tuna wrap. I detest whole wheat tortilla why did I eat it all?
The two packages of Biscoff because my dad didn’t want his.
This inferior Swanson’s microwave dinner. Stale bread. Red coloured wine. Potato salad? Chocolate cake with no icing. Is it a brownie?
And oh a Tim Horton’s bagel with cream cheese from my backpack.
And a coffee.
And pretzels I stopped eating after I figured out they weren’t peanuts.
Okay, so the bag probably wouldn’t be big enough. Luckily, we’ll never know for sure.
P.S. Bring your own food on this Air Canada direct flight from Toronto. And don’t bother buying wifi, it doesn’t load Instagram.